This world doesn’t want you to be happy. While I haven’t watched social dilemma yet, I’ve been around enough to understand that big business trades on pain and insecurity and social media gets more money the longer you’re online.

My most recent experience of this has surprisingly been with zoom. Before I get into my zoom experience, (for those of you that don’t know zoom is a video conferencing service), let’s talk about 2017 when I ran the CEO experience.

This was in part, teaching women to stop treating their businesses like a hobby and start treating them like the income creating machine that they could be.

One section was reviewing our time on social. It was something that I also did in the lead up to understand how much time was being wasted and why.
Snapchat at that time was a problem for me for two reasons. I was spending 16 hours plus a week on non-productive time on Snapchat.

Plus, I was only using photos taken on Snapchat and filtered to make me look younger in my marketing images.

It stopped being fun and about cute little ears and freckles and started to become a severe issue around how I viewed myself and my self-esteem.
So I made the decision to stop filtering my photos and start to really see myself for who I am.

Imagine my surprise when I am on zoom and see in the video filters the new light adjustments which now also take years off your age. Even with the setting dial down it’s still filters.

I’ve also noticed this with my iPhone 11, that the normal photo setting also has a softening effect on your face.

I think it would be interesting if you’ve met people on zoom to see what goes on in their head when they meet you in real life and you don’t look like that.

So how are we supposed to be happy within our own skin with who we are when every piece of technology whether consciously or unconsciously, it is programming us to believe that us on our own is somehow less?

And while I will do what it takes to look after myself, I use high-quality products for inner health and out of health, I still want to be able to see me when I look at an image compared to who I see every day in the mirror.

I even did a course in marketing that taught you on one side, to show up as your authentic self and be unashamedly you but also, heres a section on how to filter your photos?


Do I have I solution to this?

I’m not really sure. I think awareness is definitely a start and cultivating joy from within so what’s being shown on the outer doesn’t create conflict and begins to match, but this is a reminder for all of us social media is not there to make us happy.

So spend time away and make sure you’re spending time cultivating your self-esteem, yourself love and your brilliance. to be able to say I’m feeling good about myself and not just from what you see in an image.

Photos below are me after my shower this morning, me with make up after my shower and my zoom screen shot.

Even though the photo after my shower this morning doesn’t quite match what I saw in the mirror, (thanks iPhone 11) it’s closer.
And yes while I use products to look after my self, I drink my collagen every day for inner health (with the bonus of helping the outer, I’ll be upfront about that), I use the best skin products, I take my vitamins etc, the drive behind it is different to three years ago.
I want total health.

Mental, emotional and physical.

I am no longer about fitting an image of what I think society deems acceptable. So no more flitters (as much as I can avoid them).

And that my friends, is the best place to be. I’ve never felt so happy in my own skin.

It took me time to get here.

I had to unravel the meaning and emotions I had placed on past experiences to allow healing to come through.

And not just forgiveness but appreciation for everything.

TBH I am still working on things that pop up here and there but at 46 I have never felt so good about myself and my life.

I’m still offering partial coaching scholarships for 2020 to help you get to the best space to start 2021.

Ask me how to apply!